fuzzynerds

Sitting in the lobby of shadyside hospital in Steel city I hear many things. People praying, people crying, people begging for just a moment of time more with their loved ones. I hear people talking about Picc lines, Trach tubes, CBP, WBC, and Basophils. i hear people celbrating with tears of joys and happy screams. It's nothing new to me, it's my new normal. It goes in one ear and out the other. But then i hear soemthing that makes me laugh. "How long will it be beofre things go back to the way they were before all this?" The doctor doesn't answer because my laughing distracts him but also answers for him. I laugh and shake my head, much to

My dad is dying and I've already grieved. He's still here, still functioning but he is still dying. 15%, thats what the doctors said his chance of suriving his battle with the stage 4 Oral Squamous Cell Carcinomia was less than 13 months ago. It wasn't just  called cancer, no this monster had name and it lost it's battle while my dad won his. But he is still dying. And I've already grieved. "Dont' be so negative, he'll be fine. Pray and you'll see." Is what I was told when I spoke the truth that my dad is still dying even with the monster gone. I was told that I was wishing ill, that I was a horrible daughter even though I was the one who he

When I was still in school I would be coming home with nearly straight A's. Mom and dad were proud that I'm doing so good. They would be  ones telling their friends "she's learning it all! She's been taught so much and knows it all." But now I know that despite learning about Pythagoreans theorem, The civil war, E=MC^2 and that the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell that I was actually taught nothing at all. I was never taught about Nikola Tesla, I was never taught about the "father of gynecology" and how he mutilated black women and dehumanized them. I was never taught about how the Japanese were treated   like Jews over in nazi Ge

When I woke up, it was barely dawn. The sky was painted with all the colors of the wind. Purples,pinks and blues of a thousand shades. It was cold but not as cold as it had been. I sat up a little ways and looked around. Somehow a pillow had been placed under my head and I had been given a thin bare thread,moth eaten blanket but it was still a blanket. I had no memory of being handed such items, so how did they get there? A smile crept on my face when I realized where they had come from…. Inculta. I shook my head then did my regular stretching and yawning. I checked the time: 5:36 AM. I could hear someone rustling around inside the

When we arrived at the tent he turned my pip-boy light on and told me to turn on the Lantern. He reassured me that he would be back soon and then we would have dinner. I nodded and watched him leave, still dragging the sobbing woman behind him. I shivered as a cool wind blew in my direction, i headed inside the tent and turned on the small light. I switched off my piip-boy and picked up the book from earlier and decided to finish the book while waiting for him. It was nearly an hour later when Inculta returned empty handed but calmer. He seemed to relax when he saw me, his body loosened up and his fist unclenched. “Are you ready t

After lunch Inculta dropped me off at his tent, without word of where he was going or when he would be back I if he would be back. it was about two hours later, when I heard a few men arguing. To past the time I decided to read some books from Inculta's extensive collection. About 3 hours later, when I heard two men arguing outside the tent. Curious I crept over to the other side of the tent to get a better ear on the situation. “that piece of shit machine!The damn radio won't!” One male voice yelled. “Calm down Albus. We'll figure it out. Now tell me what exactly is happening” A softer male voice said. “ I

 tried to comfort the shaken woman but she turned cold and refused comfort. “Fine be that way, I'm just trying to be nice damn.” I snapped as I grabbed the eyeliner sat down in front of a mirror and started my makeup. 10 minutes later I was finished. I had simple black eyeliner and simple golden lid and a gentle crimson lip stick I looked at the slave, she sighed and looked at the clock. “You have time to spare, would you like to fetch Your husband?” I visibly gagged at the word. “God that is disgusting to even think about, please never call him that in front of me again.” I shuddered and grabbed a boo

Rabbit Fire? I’m not sure I would’ve picked it but if it’s what you want, then i guess it’s okay.” Caesar said questioning his Legate. “Thank you my lord. I was hoping you’d approve, I found it quite ironic as well as fitting.” “I can understand the reasons behind it and it is fitting, just remember she’s going to be difficult to train Inculta. Rabbits although timid can be vicious and strong willed creatures, they do bite. Now do you want to get her fitted with a collar so that you may finish up with your assignment?” Inculta in a short stride had my arm in his strong Iron